There are always moments, or even years, that we regret. It is a part of life. There are times we wish we could go back and tell ourselves what we know now, like, fight and fight again to not let your mother put you in a bonnet! (see pic above). Hindsight is a wonderful thing, however, maybe if we hadn’t worn that ridiculous eyeliner we wouldn’t be where we are today.
If I could, however, talk to my 16-year-old self, here is what I would say:
1- This boy is not the love of your life
He may be loving and care but he is obsessive and there is going to be a lot of tears. You are still very naive and no one can can tell you anything- listen to your mum though, she is always right.
2- It’s fine that you don’t know what you want to be when you grow up
School drums in to you, you MUST go to University, you MUST get a degree or you WILL NEVER get a job! Uni is not for everyone! I didn’t go. After doing A-levels i went and got a job in an office. I matured a lot quicker than my friends who went to uni and by the time they left i had my own brand new car and had moved out. I would tell my 16 year old self to not bother with the career adviser or their quiz to show which job is best for you. To them you are a statistic- be whoever you want to be!
3- The girls at school who you want to be like really aren’t that great
There is always that popular girl we always want to be like. Centre of attention, cool, popular- you know -when you leave school she is going to be just another lost lady who is academically behind because she choose to spend her time applying lipstick at the back of class whilst throwing paper balls at your head. Being cool will not get you a good job or a nice house. Strive to be happy and successful because being her will not give you a happy life.
Bunking off and not doing homework is cool right? I wish so much i had tried harder at school. Not necessarily to get a better job, but i know i could have done better. Learning is the best thing you’ll ever do in life! It may be hard, there will be tears and there will be burst of rage when the equation doesn’t agree after your twelfth attempt. Go and have a hot chocolate and try again. You got this.
5- Things will get better at home
Soon your parents will part and the fighting will stop. Your life will be peaceful and you will no longer feel like Cinderella. Life does get better.
6- Don’t listen to the bully’s
Everyone will tell you this, but, do try to not listen to the bully’s. They really are just unhappy with themselves and have low self-esteem. Maybe change your foundation too- it’s not helping with the spots and in turn the bully’s are all talking about it.
7- You are more than the mistakes you have made
Aged 14 you did something very stupid. Learn from it! It was a mistake but do not base your whole teenage years around it. You are so much better and so much more than that mistake.
8- Don’t take a single thing for granted.
Not your friends, not your teachers, not your family, anything. Enjoy every single thing in your life; especially your mum doing your laundry, because soon you will have to do it, and your partners, and his sons. Maybe even help her sometimes, she will appreciate it more than you know.